After Infertility: An Unexpected Path to Parenthood

Sometimes life presents us with uniquely difficult challenges. To be told that you aren’t able to get pregnant and have children with your own eggs seems insurmountable – and absolutely crushing. It can lead to a dark path of hopelessness, depression, and even anger. However, many couples and single women who have trouble getting pregnant are finding faith in others. IVF using donor eggs is one possible solution for your predicament.

Waiting for the sound of little footsteps...

Struggling with Infertility

Due to the nature of the female reproductive system, women over 35 have a greater chance of encountering difficulties with conception and carrying a pregnancy to term. There are many reasons for female infertility, but they can be categorized into two broad groups: problems with the environment (uterus, fallopian tubes, and hormonal balance) and problems with ovulation/egg quality. 

As women get older, the quality of their eggs deteriorates - along with their chances of getting pregnant and carrying a pregnancy to term. Women who decide on having a child in their mid-to-late 30s often discover that their eggs are no longer viable. These conditions are easily tested.

The emotional roller-coaster that follows the news can be quite emotionally taxing. Many women seek professional counseling to cope with the resulting anger, depression, or feelings of hopelessness. These emotions are perfectly healthy reactions to such a distressing situation. When the shock subsides, however, many couples choose to pursue fertility treatments to fulfill their dream of having a child.

Donor Eggs as a Path to Parenthood

Oftentimes, women go through several fertility treatments before they explore the possibility of undergoing IVF using donor eggs. In the past, donor eggs were considered something of a ‘taboo,’ as the future child wouldn’t bear the mother’s genetic legacy. This viewpoint, however, has diminished over time as more couples use donor eggs to beat infertility.

Finding a Suitable Donor

After you choose an IVF cycle using donor eggs, finding a suitable donor is perhaps the most time-consuming step. This process usually takes hopeful parents-to-be a few weeks to several months, depending on their preferences. Common considerations include: the donor’s physical characteristics, background, education, as well as ethnicity.

Legal Concerns

After you choose a donor, it is important to have all legalities regarding the donor’s involvement in the child’s life on paper. If you are using a donor egg bank, the bank takes care of these concerns for you.

Choosing Between Fresh or Frozen Donor Egg Cycles

Depending on the cycle method - fresh or frozen - the donor pool and procedures differ.

A fresh donor egg cycle requires a donor who is local to your area and available at a time of your choosing. Furthermore, all costs pertaining to the donor’s travel/medication costs are paid for by the recipient, which makes this method rather costly.

On the other hand, if you decide on using a frozen donor egg cycle, you have the chance to choose a donor from a national donor registry. This donor pool is significantly larger, and provides the opportunity to choose a donor based on more criteria relevant to you. Because the eggs in this cycle are already harvested, all medication costs regarding the donor are already covered in the price.

The Implantation Process

If you decide on a fresh donor egg cycle, you and your donor will undergo a hormonal treatment to synchronize your periods. The donor’s ovaries are stimulated to produce many eggs. From these, only the highest-quality eggs are fertilized with your partner’s (or a donor’s) sperm and then implanted into your uterus.

If you decide on a frozen donor egg cycle, your donor’s eggs are retrieved from storage and delivered to your fertility clinic. These eggs are then thawed and fertilized with your partner’s/donor’s sperm. Three to five days later, the strongest embryos are implanted into your uterus.

The Waiting

After implantation is successful, a rest period of about 2 weeks follows. This period is vital for you to recover your strength from the journey so far, and to emotionally prepare yourself for the outcome.

Giddiness, anxiety, or even mood-swings are completely normal. Professional counseling or an emotional support group can help you immensely with dealing with these errant emotions.

The Big Moment

After the waiting is over, you’ll go back to your fertility clinic for your pregnancy test. It is of vital importance to be emotionally prepared for the result. The blood test checks your hCG levels to determine if you are pregnant.

Almost there!

Final Notes

The decision to use donor eggs, of course, lies in your hands. However, many women use this latest advancement in fertility treatment to fulfill their dream of hearing their children’s angelic voices in their homes, and enjoy strong, stable, and happy families.